The Xmas Factor

The Xmas factor

Christmas, Xmas… Whatever! Does it mean anything anymore apart from spending huge amounts of money to please people who you might only want to see once a year or maybe not even at all? Shiny lights, Xmas music, Xmas trees, everybody happy… or maybe not! Stress! Stressing about what presents to get, how much money to spend, what to cook, who to invite… Aaaaaarg! Yes, Xmas, happy times!

If you think about it, really, it’s a bit of a carry on, a grotesque kind of show, even…Who’s the tackiest of them all! In a way, it makes me think of the first stages of an X-factor contest, a competition to show off…

Possible entries to the Xmas factor:

- Getting stuffed with food and drink to the point of vomiting on Christmas Day, and actually vomit.
- Working as Santa in a Shopping Mall and having a fag and a pint on you break in front of the children.
- Dress as Santa in your work Christmas Party and end up sleeping unconscious on the street with a Kebab in your hand.
- Dance around the Christmas tree singing “(I want to give you) one 4 Xmas” by Hot Panz.
- Trying to snog the security guards on New Year’s Eve.
- Telling your boss, he or she can get stuffed like a turkey on Christmas day after having a few too many Glühweins.
- Explaining in detail your latest sexual encounter to anybody who would care to listen at your family Christmas meal.
- And so on… and so forth…

So, who's the winner?

Have a Happy Christmas! :)

About men and shoes

Let’s go and get some shoes! What do I want the shoes for? I want some shoes for climbing mountains, strong, resistant, comfortable, long-lasting, waterproof, and practical, like a good friend that is always there for you when you need him and who’s never going to fail you…

Should I spend a lot of money on party shoes? Well… The shoes have to match that dress that I will probably only wear once in my life, so I’d rather not spend too much money on them. They have to look what they’re not, that is, good. So they have to look pretty and amazing without particularly being of good quality, like a one-night stand…

What about getting some nice good quality boots for the winter? Should I spend a lot of money on them? Aw, why not? Let’s use the credit card! Nice pair of black boots made of patent leather, good for any weather, will go well with any clothes and last for years… Boots that you will probably wear until the seams start to wear off, because you will become so attached to them, like an interesting, good-looking and faithful guy that you’ll love to bits and will be there for you for a long time, a sort of long term relationship…

I wouldn’t mind a nice lovely pair of party shoes, not too uncomfortable, which should go well with several outfits and I could wear several times but only occasionally, like a love affair…

Let’s not forget about those shoes that I really like, in the shop I go past every morning. Far too expensive, but… I can feel an unresolved sexual tension between us…